No, its not a club scene. Its actually all the things that feed my soul, what a breath of fresh air.
So I am reading this book by Deepak Chopra, The seven spiritual laws of success. Concise and oh so very interesting. A really good read. It speaks to living your life in such a way that allows for your happiness that ultimately is in direct co-relation with the good of the universe. My favorite quote throughout the book is "This moment is as it should be". Something that I am going to try to remember, even when I am at my worst.
It is particularly refreshing to have a conversation about something beyond who makes how much, who drives what, whose husband makes how much more. It is so much more interesting for me to consider what motivates and inspires us, what we struggle with, what makes us tick. Within the past few days I have had contact with two people who have inspired me to consider and revive my passions. For me, light, color, music laughter, living -ultimately an expression of LOVE.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Monday, July 7, 2008
What's with the dreads?
Some of my friends are just a little sickened by my thing for the dreads. I am still trying to figure it out myself. The past three guys I have dated have all sported those long tresses that never get touched by a comb. To me it's sooo sexy! I am not saying that I am attracted to all dreads but, Yes, it will get my attention.
The fact that its afrocentric, that there is usually a swagger that goes with those locks and a toss of the head that is in no way effeminate, all these add to my attraction. A really handsome face crowned with a mass of dreads is so attractive. So primal and lion like. I think my mother is to blame, all that Bob Marley music, crying when he died, what was I supposed to do?
I don't only like dreads, I think that David Beckham, Brad Pitt and Nigel Barker are the sexiest celebs around, but i have to say the dreads do it for me. Hell, I'm done explaining I just think they're hot!
The fact that its afrocentric, that there is usually a swagger that goes with those locks and a toss of the head that is in no way effeminate, all these add to my attraction. A really handsome face crowned with a mass of dreads is so attractive. So primal and lion like. I think my mother is to blame, all that Bob Marley music, crying when he died, what was I supposed to do?
I don't only like dreads, I think that David Beckham, Brad Pitt and Nigel Barker are the sexiest celebs around, but i have to say the dreads do it for me. Hell, I'm done explaining I just think they're hot!
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Yikes! Puberty.........on its way!
Gosh, so I was wondering why my seven year old has a comment for everything that comes out of my mouth. I now know why..........
So I am in front of my computer at home wondering why I still have so much junk email even though i use all kinds of blockers when she shouts out "Mommy smell!". I turn away from the monitor to see her with her arm up to the sky motioning for me to smell her pits. Like yuk! The thought only equals the actual odor that this skinny little kid emits!
"So that means I get to use deodorant?" she says. I sense some joy and pride that I wish would go back from wherever it came from. That also means I have to get into "Mommy Mode" and a lecture is necessary. No, ....not the birds and the bees yet. My god, I dodge the "how are babies made" question every couple of weeks. It seems the fascination never grows old. No matter how much I use the clinical terms, I sometimes feel she just wants to know about the raw sex act. The graphics of that are yet to be revealed by me. I still think too young.
But wait, she is getting pretty close though. I was able to curb the excitement of the "Deodarant" joy when I went on to talk about the growth of pubic hair and getting a period. I was secretly pleased when she got really grossed out, her expression was priceless. It was kind of the same pleasure I get when she says she does not want to get married or have kids. I tell her no, but I am really very elated........although I know its all about to change. She now thinks that guy from High School Musical, Corbin, with the crazy hair is cute. Well I guess I am partly to blame, you see I like guys with crazy hair too, dreads are number one in my book. .........Gosh now I have a feeling I already know what i am in for, somebody get me some pills -I feel a headache coming on.....!
So I am in front of my computer at home wondering why I still have so much junk email even though i use all kinds of blockers when she shouts out "Mommy smell!". I turn away from the monitor to see her with her arm up to the sky motioning for me to smell her pits. Like yuk! The thought only equals the actual odor that this skinny little kid emits!
"So that means I get to use deodorant?" she says. I sense some joy and pride that I wish would go back from wherever it came from. That also means I have to get into "Mommy Mode" and a lecture is necessary. No, ....not the birds and the bees yet. My god, I dodge the "how are babies made" question every couple of weeks. It seems the fascination never grows old. No matter how much I use the clinical terms, I sometimes feel she just wants to know about the raw sex act. The graphics of that are yet to be revealed by me. I still think too young.
But wait, she is getting pretty close though. I was able to curb the excitement of the "Deodarant" joy when I went on to talk about the growth of pubic hair and getting a period. I was secretly pleased when she got really grossed out, her expression was priceless. It was kind of the same pleasure I get when she says she does not want to get married or have kids. I tell her no, but I am really very elated........although I know its all about to change. She now thinks that guy from High School Musical, Corbin, with the crazy hair is cute. Well I guess I am partly to blame, you see I like guys with crazy hair too, dreads are number one in my book. .........Gosh now I have a feeling I already know what i am in for, somebody get me some pills -I feel a headache coming on.....!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Woman to Woman...... It's tough!
Gosh, female friendships for me have lately become a chore! Well, if you can consider lately to be most of my adult life, which amounts to just over a decade -then so be it! Not that I am better with the other gender but gosh it seems so much more straightforward dealing with men as exhausting as that in itself is!
My female relationships up until about twenty have been strong representations of sisterhood where we aspire together and inspire each other toward our varied goals. Now its more like competition, jealousy and cat fighting to prove "I'm better than you". For me, this does not allow me to maintain healthy sustained friendships with those of my own gender because I really only like competing with one person, -myself!
The friendships of my youth are strong as ever and are separated only by the physcial distance that throws some of my very best friends all over the globe. We feel pride in each others accomplishments and share each others pain, all in the same spirit of camraderie we had as young idealistic teens.
So my question, which may remain unanswered is why the adult relationships that I now form with women seem to always involve the horns and claws coming out at some stage? It can't be cultural. A lot of these women are from the same culture that I was raised in. Is this some kind pageantry notion that is instilled in women, that exhibits itself in our adulthood. "Hey bitch gimme that tiara!" I dont know beats me............
My female relationships up until about twenty have been strong representations of sisterhood where we aspire together and inspire each other toward our varied goals. Now its more like competition, jealousy and cat fighting to prove "I'm better than you". For me, this does not allow me to maintain healthy sustained friendships with those of my own gender because I really only like competing with one person, -myself!
The friendships of my youth are strong as ever and are separated only by the physcial distance that throws some of my very best friends all over the globe. We feel pride in each others accomplishments and share each others pain, all in the same spirit of camraderie we had as young idealistic teens.
So my question, which may remain unanswered is why the adult relationships that I now form with women seem to always involve the horns and claws coming out at some stage? It can't be cultural. A lot of these women are from the same culture that I was raised in. Is this some kind pageantry notion that is instilled in women, that exhibits itself in our adulthood. "Hey bitch gimme that tiara!" I dont know beats me............
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
So this is set up day. What's happening with me? Lots.
To start with I am dealing with Kalongi ( the 16 year old love of my life that is a green two-door Tercel). I have recently made the move after a decade from NYC to B'more and inevitably brought Kalongi along for the ride so to speak. Having driven only about 3 miles each day for the past three years, he was notably shell shocked with the daily 20 mile journey each way to trek me back and forth to work. This also excludes pick up from soccer, swimming and basketball!
On first getting here, poor Kalongi was running without oil, and the engine gave on a trip that had been my fourth from the two hundred mile trek to NY. The title of "ole ye faithful" has now been claimed for my love.
Having that repaired he was running like he used to until yesterday when the gas pedal somehow became disloged just after getting on the exit to Washington Blvd. Luckily for me I was about a mile away from my job and was able to maneuver two turns on whatever residual gas there was that allowed me to stop two buildings from my job. (Tell me there is not a God!) Thanks for Rich who is my new best friend and tutor for a dumb girls guide to everything auto, the damsel in distress was saved and able to make it home yesterday!
To start with I am dealing with Kalongi ( the 16 year old love of my life that is a green two-door Tercel). I have recently made the move after a decade from NYC to B'more and inevitably brought Kalongi along for the ride so to speak. Having driven only about 3 miles each day for the past three years, he was notably shell shocked with the daily 20 mile journey each way to trek me back and forth to work. This also excludes pick up from soccer, swimming and basketball!
On first getting here, poor Kalongi was running without oil, and the engine gave on a trip that had been my fourth from the two hundred mile trek to NY. The title of "ole ye faithful" has now been claimed for my love.
Having that repaired he was running like he used to until yesterday when the gas pedal somehow became disloged just after getting on the exit to Washington Blvd. Luckily for me I was about a mile away from my job and was able to maneuver two turns on whatever residual gas there was that allowed me to stop two buildings from my job. (Tell me there is not a God!) Thanks for Rich who is my new best friend and tutor for a dumb girls guide to everything auto, the damsel in distress was saved and able to make it home yesterday!
The equivalent of a journal online..........Fantabulous! Here I am to represent the thoughts, ideas and experiences of a West Indian Woman living in the US. Nuff stories right! I am a thirty something, uh let me count...........thirty-two year old Trinidad-born chica living life on my own terms loving it and sometimes screaming and yes even crying while doing so.
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